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ACTIVE LISTENING

April 08 2023 – Delikate Rayne

 
Active listening has been a common technique used in therapy, training, and solving many disputes and conflicts. It is the habit of attentively listening and engaging with a partner with understanding and reflection, withholding the need to judge and give an opinion. By doing this, you give the other person the freedom to express their feelings and feel valued, while creating a good foundation for future conversations.

Listening to speak or pretending to concentrate on all that is being said is not a form of active listening. Nor do you have to be in agreement with what the other person is saying. Giving the person speaking your full attention is crucial for any successful conversation. Some tips and key features of actively listening are as follows, according to our sources:
  • Being neutral and nonjudgmental
  • Practicing patience in periods of silence, being fast to listen and slow to speak
  •  Verbally and non-verbally giving feedback to show signs of listening such as smiling and mirroring; also picking up on nonverbal cues that tell more than the words that are being said
    • Asking open-ended questions and for clarifications, avoiding subject changes and simple yes or no questions that typically end a conversation and show you aren't listening
    • Reflecting back and paraphrasing what is said rather than giving advice to show the person that they are heard
    • Staying out of your own head, avoiding daydreams and your internal dialogue in a conversation
    • Learning from examples of active listening practices and picking up on mistakes

Actively listening can improve your life in several ways. In your relationships, it not only validates your partner and make them feel understood, but it helps you to empathize and understand their point of view before jumping to any wrong conclusions. Whether you're conversating with a colleague or customer, practicing this technique is said to better equip you to understand problems and collaborate when developing solutions. Even as you meet new people, applying the strategies above will help you learn more about a person than you would only talking about yourself.

If you notice yourself speaking to a person who isn't being an active listener, you can encourage them by finding a topic that you both would like to discuss.

Whatever the topic, ensure that you are displaying good listening skills yourself by being quick to listen and slow to speak as the person should eventually start to mirror after you. However, if the person is not willing to actively listen, leaving the conversation is the best choice as what you have to say is just as valuable and should be treated as such.

Sources: Very Well Mind
Photos via Pinterest (Toyas Tales) & Wonderwall Editors